Where I grew up he was called a trouble-maker. They didn't mean any real harm, it was what their parents had taught them too. Racism was one of those things that I knew society said was wrong, but it made no difference. There it was ok.....
I remember the first time that the light came on for me. I was in my grandparents kitchen watching a DC Talk Behind-the-musicish special on the Insp. network. Racism had long been one of their platforms. I remember when they said, "This is wrong. This is sin". It was one of those times in my life (that would later be repeated) when something outside me struck a resounding chord with something that was already happening IN me. I guess I had known all along, but it was like the Holy Spirit was saying, "SEE! This is what I've been telling you". Now Dr. King is one of my heroes, for a lot of reasons, but partly because he was patient with people like me.

Giggle-box

Generally I don't support the use of profanity...at least not publicly. :) But there is one term that I heard a few years ago (and that us used often by one of my FAVORITE authors- ). It's not that I want to use it.
It's not that I COULD use it if I wanted to because I burst into uncontrollable giggles every time someone says:


Ass-hat.


Hat? Really? How can you be angry when you call someone that? Even as I write I'm trying to work up enough wrath to say "that guy's really an ass-hat". Crap. I just laughed out loud in the coffee shop.

Redeeming the time.

About 18 months ago I wrote the following: 

My loneliness is too much to bear. You didn't owe me anything... but is this how you reward the faithful? By leaving them desolate and uncared for? By making their ministry a mockery and their faithfulness a reason for others to stray? You are not evil. I have always believed this...but are you good? My conscience answers that question for me. So why would you leave me alone for years...for a decade as I watch others go on to live the life that I prayed for. I beg you, God. BE FAITHFUL TO ME! You bottle my tears? You are near to those of a broken heart? You work all things together for our good? How can I believe these things when all I see is abandonment of the faithful.

Yeah. It makes me sad too. I was nearing the point where my faith was not just stretched but at the point of tearing. I wanted so desperately to move on with one of my heart's most guarded and tender desires- to be loved and eventually married.

I think sometimes that God knows the exact point at which we will break and I was nearing mine. Little did I know that right around the corner was:

And that meeting him would redeem every moment of waiting and every question I had about God's love for me and His wisdom in making me wait.